The Dark Inside (A Human Element) Read online

  He let her go. His handprints were traced on her arms. Evidence that he had indeed touched a woman.

  She looked at him with real tears in her eyes now and then walked to the door. Opened it. Looked back. "It's no use fighting it, Felix. They own Laura as they own you. Own me. If you don't give her up they will torture you until you do."

  He walked toward her. "I never will."

  "Then they will kill you."

  He smiled down at her now. It felt strange on his face. It was foreign and false. She had unlocked his humanity and it had ruined everything. His life and hers. "No, they won't."

  Her mouth hung open slightly, that mouth he had savored. With one sweep of his hand he shoved the door shut and grabbed her by the neck. She dropped her phone. He lifted her off the floor. She was his today. But Laura was his every day. Forever.

  Maria shrieked. Once. Her body quivered beneath his hands as it had just minutes earlier. Her legs bucked. Her arms grabbed at him. She spasmed against him. And it was a different kind of pleasure for him now. And she watched him as he watched her.

  And then she watched no more.

  He added her to the trunk's cargo and went to dispose of the bodies.

  It was his job.

  Frat Night

  A Coopersville Tale

  Tara gripped Jonah's hand, allowing herself to be pulled along the cliff and into the dense woods. The wind swirled her blonde hair in a ghostly veil as the moon fleetingly showed itself from behind the sable sky. Inky clouds rushed over her in a violent race to night's end. Branches clawed at her as if to warn her, you're not wanted here.

  "Jonah, I think a storm is coming. Maybe we should go back." Tara had to shout over the increasing wind.

  Jonah turned and smiled. He pulled her near. His leather jacket strained against her cheek. She shivered beside his hard body in the warm spring night.

  "Don't worry. We're almost there. We'll be safe in the castle," he said. He adjusted his knapsack and grabbed her hand, hurrying them along.

  She stumbled after him. Her heart throbbed fast, knowing what they would do at the castle. She couldn't believe Jonah liked her the night they met a month ago. He was a cool senior in Phi Beta, and she only a freshman at her first frat party. She played shy trying to be different from the other girls. She told him she was a virgin. He respected that and always stopped right when things got too heated between them on the few dates they had. It was agony for Tara to go along with it. She had been more than kissed back home. Sometimes not so softly either. But she yearned for romance now and Jonah seemed like a gentleman.

  One night after a hot make-out session in his room Jonah told her about an abandoned castle up on Coopersville Mountain above the college. Some rich man had built it for his fiancé who died before they married. Heartbroken, he moved away and let it sit in ruin. Jonah found it peaceful, he said. He would sit on the castle wall and think of taking someone special there. Tara knew he meant her. After all the time they'd spent together she would now give him what he wanted. What she wanted.

  The castle loomed ahead. Its craggy spires taunted them. Jonah drew her inside. She caught a last glance of the woods as she passed into the rock walls. Blackness consumed her.

  "Don't be scared." Jonah squeezed her hand.

  He flicked on a lighter, casting tall shadows. The flame flickered in the wind that flew through the castle rooms, seeking escape. He had brought her to the castle's church sanctuary.

  Tara darted her eyes around the room and held his hand tighter. He lit candles lining a rock ledge and the sanctuary grew cozy, embracing them. Jonah pulled a thick blanket from his knapsack and laid it on the stone floor. He glanced at her and she went to him. Her hair floated around him and he caressed it, kissing her. He pulled her down. Thunder broke. Their bodies intertwined with a desire that grew wilder as the wind raged on. Rain streamed down, spattering in from crevices. Lightning and candlelight exploded together in white fire, licking the walls of their hideaway.

  When she was panting with need, he pushed aside her underwear to enter her. He was gentle at first. She rose to meet him in passion, but soon his soft breath on her neck turned to angry grunts. His slow thrusts became a pounding assault. He pulled her legs wider. She gasped in pain. Light flashed across his face. He was smiling.

  "Jonah!" She pushed on his chest to slow his pace, but he held her down, slamming into her. He raised his head, and with a final thrust, groaned as he erupted deep in her quaking body. Tara tried to push him off, but he withdrew and stood up towering over her. She curled her arms in and sat up, crying. He was no different from the boys back home. She hated them. And she hated Jonah now.

  "You're not a virgin." Jonah glared at her, his nakedness now terrifying.

  "I…no, I'm not," Tara stammered. The room no longer glowed with romantic warmth. The stone walls rose cold around her.

  "You lied to me. All this time I've put into you. Wasted!" He flung her clothes down. "Get dressed. But take your underwear off first."

  Tara was confused but pulled off her underwear. He grabbed them. She drew on the rest of her clothes.

  "I thought you liked me," Tara whispered, wiping away tears.

  Jonah turned to her, now dressed as well. "I have a lot of money riding on you. Whoever nails the most virgins at Phi Beta this semester wins the pot." He gripped her underwear in his hand. "It's up to five grand. I need that money. Understand?"

  "No, I don't," Tara said. She stopped crying. Rage churned inside her.

  "I am tied with Brian Saunders–I would have won with you," he spat out. "Our last day is tomorrow. I don't want to split the money with him."

  "Why are you doing this?" She felt so stupid.

  "You girls are so eager to give it to a Phi Beta guy I might as well make money on you. Now you need to help me win it all." Jonah pulled a stone from the wall and drew out a bundle. He dropped it at her feet. It was underwear, bloodied from real virgins.

  "It's my proof." Jonah laughed. "Now you're gonna prove it too." He flicked open a serrated knife.

  Tara stumbled back. Who even knew she was here?

  "Give me your finger." He leered. "We need blood. Get it?" He shook her underwear. His knife pointed down, glinting in the candlelight.

  Lightning flashed through the window behind Tara, and Jonah shut his eyes. In that instant, Tara shoved his hand away. The knife pierced his side. Jonah screamed and fell to his knees, grabbing for her. He got the cuff of her jeans, but she lunged for the door.

  She pushed through the woods, her legs pumping, feeling her way. The moon hid behind thick clouds. Rain poured over her in a streaming cacophony. Was he following her? How bad had she hurt him?

  "You bitch," Jonah yelled.

  Tara stopped, straining to see him.

  "I'm gonna find you!"

  Branches snapped behind her. She kept running, disoriented, when the ground gave way. She slid and reached out, grabbing a tree trunk. The moon still offered no light. Was she near the cliff? She sunk in the mud behind the tree, shivering in wet clothes. The rain fell in a roar.

  A mass moved in the shadows. Jonah staggered along, bent at the waist.

  "Tara, oh, Tara," he sang over the rain. "Where are you?"

  He was so close she could stand up and touch him. She was gripped with fear–then fury. She stood up and ran at him, shoving him hard in the chest. "Fuck you!"

  His eyes blazed white in the dark. He tried to grab her, but disappeared from view.

  A perverse joy rose within her but then she slid on mud. She fell on her knees and crawled to where he fell. Where was he? As if to answer, the moon broke through the clouds and lit the landscape. It was the cliff. He was on a ledge about thirty feet down–legs and arms splayed like a broken doll. Then he moved.

  "Tara, help…I'm sorry." The rain slowed. His voice carried up to her.

  She stared down at him, willing him to die.

  He twisted his head to look up.

  "Please, don't leave me
. It was just a game…I did like you. I do like you. God…why did you have to stab me. Oh, man. I'm bleeding. A lot. I think my leg and arm are broken too."

  Tara held onto the cliff's edge, watching in silence. The moon slid out from its hideaway illuminating Jonah's crooked body. The rain had stopped. She didn't feel cold anymore. She was caked in drying mud, but gladness surged through her, listening to Jonah's pleas. Empowerment consumed her. No one could hurt her again.

  "Tara!" Jonah sobbed and she felt giddy.

  She giggled. What was wrong with her?

  His cries grew weaker. They tapered off.

  Die you bastard.

  Jonah was motionless.

  Better make sure.

  She picked up a rock and threw it down. It plunked off him and fell further. He didn't move. She threw another. Then another. In a gleeful rage, she howled as she pummeled him with rocks until there were none left. Her satisfaction spent, she crawled back into the woods and stood up.

  The moon glowed soft through the trees, lighting the way.

  She strolled back, enjoying the spring night.

  The Tree of Sheltered Secrets

  A Coopersville Tale

  I saw the house standing there. The clouds rushed over it like a roaring river tumbling along to the sea. This house I had only seen in my mind for ten years. Now abandoned. The paint peeled from it in layers. The sky was an act of violence above the still and silent house. This house that made me. It was now as lifeless as I felt.

  Then I saw the empty space behind it. An act of violence had happened here too. My favorite apple tree was gone. Like the grandfather of trees, its craggy arms once reached out to me in a snarling embrace. It had watched over me. In summer I stood on the rock wall and hid myself in its fruit-filled drapes. I would dance under it with fireflies on searing summer nights when I couldn't breathe in my stifling bedroom.

  I tightened my stomach. It hurt. It felt good to hurt. And I wanted to hurt the one who had hurt my old friend.

  This tree had been my summer, my winter, my fall, and spring. I walked toward the empty space my friend had occupied near the rock wall it once hugged. I couldn't hide anymore. The rest of the orchard stood behind the wall, full and strong as always.

  I sat down beside the rock wall. I tried to hide into it like I did my comforting tree, but it was cold and lifeless. I wanted to disappear, as I had often wanted to disappear growing up in that house across from my tree. I had hurt there, although not of my own doing.

  "Hilary!" My name rose over the wind and my uncle came around the side of the house.

  I shrunk into the jagged rock and hugged my knees to my chest. I wiped my face on my muddy jeans.

  "Hilary, what the hell are you doing?" My uncle hovered, hands on his hips.

  "Nothing."

  "You're filthy." He sighed and grabbed my arm, pulling me up. "We've got to go. I said we could only stop in Coopersville for a minute."

  I shook my arm off and walked ahead of him. Perhaps he was my guardian now but he couldn't control me.

  "Wait, I want you to get that mud off before you get in the car."

  I kept walking.

  "You wanted to see your tree didn't you?" I turned to stare at him. "I could have told you it wasn't here."

  "Why?"

  "I was the one who cut it down."

  I glared at him and crossed my arms.

  "So it couldn't hide you anymore."

  My uncle strode ahead of me and opened the back of the car. He pulled out some rags and threw them at me.

  "Wipe your pants off and your face too. We never should have stopped here. It's been ten years since your parents died. You're seventeen now. This place doesn't matter anymore."

  I stared at the rags on the ground. Today, I cried inside–not for my parents but for a tree.

  My uncle half smiled as he moved toward me. He picked up the rags. I stared at the bald spot on his head. He wiped my cheek gently, but I grabbed the rags away from him. He would not touch me again.

  His eyes shrunk into tiny pits of blackness. "Get in the car."

  I looked back at the empty space where my tree had been. It had been my only shelter on nights when my uncle visited my bedroom. I hid myself then under its bowed arms and leaves, terrified he would find me. Summer had been my savior from him when the leaves grew. And then one night he did find me.

  I watched him get in the driver's side but I didn't move. I turned and ran. Back to that empty space. I scrambled over the rock wall and ran through the orchard.

  "Hilary!" I heard a car door slam.

  I felt like my heart would leap out of my chest to quiver and die right there upon the earth. My heart had nearly died in that house. It never blossomed again, but lay dormant and shriveled within me all these years.

  "I hate you!" Ragged branches tugged at me. I stumbled then and fell. I was wet and cold but didn't get up. I suffered on the muddy earthen floor. I had suffered for so long.

  Finally, I stood.

  I didn't want to suffer anymore.

  "Hilary."

  I saw my uncle's head move closer. And then in my dark world I saw beauty. White crocuses poked their heads up in a joyful burst next to me. I picked them and held them to my face, breathing in their sweetness. I wet them with my tears and spread their softness on my cheeks. Next to them I saw wood and wire. An old farm fence. A reminder that we needed to be walled in. That there were places that had boundaries. I wished for a place like that now.

  I grasped one of the rotted stakes from that fallen fence. I tugged at it. It was sharp at the top, like an arrow.

  "Hilary! You can't run from me, dear."

  I didn't answer.

  "I know how you feel. Don't you think I miss my brother?"

  Liar. He had me all to himself now. Like he had always wanted. I tugged harder and the stake loosened. My uncle crunched on dead branches and leaves. Barbed wire wrapped around the stake like the prickly necklace of a wrinkled woman seeking to be beautiful once again. It looked beautiful to me.

  It came free and I slipped behind a tree. I saw him. His head bent, picking his way around muddy spots. He hated getting dirty. He hated me getting dirty. But he was the one who made me dirty.

  I shrunk behind the tree and waited. Held that stake like a sword. The barbed wire cut into my hands. I held it tighter. I was ready to claim my heart again. My uncle's boots snapped on a twig. It echoed loud in the lonely woods. He was so close I could hear him breathing.

  And it was then that I decided I would hide no more.

  The Beginning

  After They Left

  Adrian

  The silent dark hung under a star-filled sky. Adrian picked up his bag and scanned his crew across the field, counting quickly. Seventy-five. They understood their duty and accepted it. They were chosen by him in secret. None would return. There was nothing to go back to except death.

  His son, Caleb, stood across from him, waiting as the others did. Their pale faces glowed like orbs within their gray hooded robes. It was too dark to see if his son's face held scorn or doubt. It was usually one or the other. Especially since he had deceived Caleb about this mission–and his own intentions.

  The group waited for his instruction. "We head toward town."

  Caleb opened his mouth as if to say something. His black hair, like his face, was a constant reminder of his mother. Adrian frowned and his son shut his mouth and nodded, stepping in behind him. Rain fell soft, cold and lifeless.

  The dark deepened as they headed into the forest. Ancient conifers towered over them, blocking out the moon. Adrian allowed his senses to guide him. The nearest town of Benevolence was five miles northwest. He smiled to himself. It was the perfect town for a stolen new beginning.

  He stopped after a while and opened his mind's eye for guidance on which way to go.

  "Father, how much further?" Caleb called. "Some of the younger females are struggling."

  Caleb's dark eyes stung him through the mi
st that rose up from the forest floor. How he wanted a son like himself, instead of one so like his wife. All that sadness and longing in her eyes, the day he'd left her to die in the well. That pity.

  "Two more miles. Arrange for some of the others to take on the baggage of those in need."

  "Can't we stop for a bit and rest?" His people grumbled audibly. They looked wet and tired, a sea of gray flowing down from him. Such weakness. He would have to drive that out.

  And he would breed another to take Caleb's place. He already had a female in mind for the job. She smiled at him in the crowd, holding the promise of submission. But time was running out to groom a new son.

  "We do not stop." Adrian's voice rose over the line of people before him. "You all took the oath to come here. Hard work lies before us in breeding our new community. Understood?"

  He didn't wait for a response but turned around and plunged faster through the woods. His people followed in silence, as he knew they would. If they didn't they knew the consequences. As did Caleb. His son had no special privilege here.

  At last Adrian stepped out onto a paved road. It stretched far into the distance, where welcoming lights beckoned them across the final mile. They reached the main intersection of town. A car flashed by, radio blaring. Faces stared out at them. He realized how out of place they looked, this robed group out late at night. He motioned for his people to follow him single file down the sidewalk. A handful of people sat behind windows drinking. They pointed at Adrian and his people as they walked by. "Gillian's Bar" flashed in neon green above the doorway in the late evening hours. A man and woman, heading into the bar, stepped back from the sidewalk to watch them pass. Freaks, he heard the man say. Adrian erased the memory of the encounter from these strangers' minds in the seconds it took to pass them.

  "Father," Caleb hissed in his ear. "Where are we going?"

  A large building rose at the far end of a parking lot. "Ray's Lots" blinked over and over.